Proceedings from the Congressional Golden Llama Committee

The congressional Golden Llama Committee is called to order, his honorable congressman Paul Ryan presiding

Ryan (R-WI): Welcome back from your August vacation, fellow committee members.  I hope the town hall meetings about the Golden llamas were not too raucous in your district.

(Laughs from committee members and the large gallery at the proceedings)

Ryan:  We are here again to discuss who merits a Golden Llama award.  As a personal note, I think that Golden Llamas should be a right all Americans can enjoy.  It is basic and fundamental, and consistent with the views of our founding fathers, that Americans should have access to the honor and prestige this award brings.

Joe Wilson (R-SC): YOU LIE!  YOU LIE!

Ryan:  Not yet, Mr. Wilson.  You are supposed to do that when the Democrats talk.

Max Baucus (D-Mont): With all due respect, Mr. Ryan, we as a committee have yet to produce anything except an excessive amount of press coverage.  We need to move on to the task at hand and stop the partisan bickering.

Wilson: YOU LIE!  YOU LIE!

Ryan:  Good boy, Joe.  OK, now we need to consider the candidates for this award as outlined in the speech by President Obama.

Wilson: YOU LIE!  YOU LIE!

Ryan:  Enough, Mr. Wilson.  We need to get this moving or the blog post will go on forever.  Readers only have so much patience for this, you know.  Here to present the nominees is Vice President Joe Biden.  Mr. vice president?

Biden:  Thank you, Mr. Chairman.  In conjunction with the opinion of the American public, the CDC, and the capricious whims of an unnamed blogger, the current names have been put forth as worthy recipients for the coveted Golden Llama Award:

The first recipient is Gary, who submitted the following title for the caption contest: \”Borat to Bruno: I am hearing healthcare is really not in America.\”

(Guffaws erupt in the meeting hall)

The second is Middle Aged Lady (no link provided), who clearly was enraptured by the picture, writing:

  • \”Gosh – you’re a hottie!\”
  • \”Well I KNEW which one you were and you’re still a hottie!!!!!\”

Audience and committee: Awwwww, how nice.

Ryan:  Yes, flattering Dr. Rob is a sure-fire way to get a GLA.

Biden:  We are struggling with Lindsey, who said the following:

  • \”Dr. Rob, no witty caption to share… but you’re older than I thought you were.  I guess I was deceived because your blog is hip, fly and trendy.\”
  • (After saying that she Googled and found out the guy on the left was Ryan):  \”Hold on there, you’re assuming I was referring to Congressman Ryan as being the hottie.
    And yes, your assumption would be right. But hey, you’re old enough to be my cool, hip & trendy dad so it would be weird to refer to you as a hottie.\”
  • \”Well, all joking aside, I think you’re still cool, hip, trendy AND fly.
    I better stop now while my point count is still in the trillions.\”

Ryan:  She thought I was a hottie?  I clearly think she should get a GLA.  She is clearly a very intelligent person.

Baucus:  I was going to say the opposite, Mr. Ryan.  With all due respect, the American public prefers the distinguished look of a man with a beard, not the baby-faced expression you have.  She clearly is doing some sort of drug.

Henry Waxman (D-CA): Mr. Ryan, is it true that you use performance-enhancing hair products?

Ryan:  That is out of order, Mr. Waxman.  I have always said that I would undergo routine urine testing to prove my innocence.

Wilson: YOU LIE!  YOU LIE!

(Wilson is hit with a tranquilizer dart and falls forward, unconscious)

Ryan:  Thank you, Mr. Cheney.  Mr. Biden, what is the recommendation of the president?

Biden:  President Obama assures you that he does not intend to socialize the GLA but feels that increased government involvement is imperative to keep Dr. Rob honest.

Ryan:  Meaning?

Biden:  He said we should flip a coin.  (Flips a coin).  Your call, Mr. Ryan.

Ryan:  I have to call heads.  It\’s about the hair, isn\’t it?

Biden:  Heads it is.  She\’s in.

(Applause from the audience)

Biden:  There is one more from the blog post, and then there is a special consideration award.  The last commenter to get a GLA is another without a link, named Chloe.  Chloe made the observation that you, Mr. Ryan, look an awful lot like the Avatar for the House Call Doctor.  Please refer to the following picture to see this marked similarity.

(Meeting room erupts with gasps followed by shouts, press correspondents scribbling notes frantically.)

Ryan:  ORDER!  ORDER IN THE MEETING HALL!

(Commotion stops suddenly when there is a sudden gunshot.  A man stands with a rifle aimed at the ceiling, grinning).

Ryan:  Thank you, Mr. Cheney.

Baucus:  Mr. Ryan, with all due respect, how do you explain the incredible likeness?  I am afraid this may require a full investigation.

Ryan:  I deny that I had any part in the choosing of this avatar, but you definitely see why this podcast is gaining popularity.  What a fine-looking guy!

Wilson:  YOU LIE!  YOU LIE!

Biden:  Mr. Ryan, I suggest you stay away from all public transit for a while.  This image definitely will ignite a panic among the general population.  Can we move to the last nominee?

Ryan:  Please!  This blog post is going on forever.

Biden: The last award is somewhat unprecedented.  It is being awarded to a previous award-winner.

(Murmuring begins in the audience, but stops immediately with a sharp glance from Mr. Cheney)

Biden:  The last award goes to Cerulian Bill.

Ryan:  Why is he being awarded this for a second time?  Doesn\’t that increase the gap between the haves and have-nots?  I would think Mr. Obama would oppose this nomination.

Biden:  He did, but Dr. Rob negotiated with him, allowing him to have previews on upcoming podcasts in exchange for this second award.  Dr. Rob feels fairly strongly Bill deserves it.

Ryan:  For what?

Biden:  He sent Dr. Rob a funny llama camel picture.  Observe the following:

(Loud laughter fills the chamber.  Even the former Vice President cannot contain himself and, while doubled-over in laughter, he almost shoots the ear off of a friend)

Ryan: (Having difficulty talking through his own giggles) I can see why Dr. Rob insisted.  Shucks.  Nothing brings joy to the heart of man like a funny camel (or llama) picture.

Baucus: That is something that has bipartisan support.

(Audience claps loudly.  As they do, a page whispers in Mr. Ryans ear).

Ryan:  (Banging gavel)  There seems to be a last-minute nomination.  I am not sure what the legality of this is, but Betsy McCaughey is here to explain.

McCaughey:  Thank you Mr. Chairman.  I am here to put forth an alternative choice for llama pictures.  If you read Dr. Rob\’s blog carefully, you will see that he talks a lot about political issues, including the threat from \”Death Panels.\”  He has just obtained undeniable evidence that this will not only be the case, but that llamas will be involved.  Another reader named Bill (not of the Cerulian persuasion) submitted the following picture that appears on Time Magazine\’s website:

(Gasps from the audience and shouts from committee members drown out any attempt to regain order).

Dr. Rob:  Congratulations to winners.  You may pick up your logo to display on your blog by emailing me.

32 thoughts on “Proceedings from the Congressional Golden Llama Committee”

  1. are you sure those aren’t camels in that car? They look more like camels to me than llamas. Not that llamas aren’t camelidae of course. But camels aren’t llamas!

  2. are you sure those aren’t camels in that car? They look more like camels to me than llamas. Not that llamas aren’t camelidae of course. But camels aren’t llamas!

  3. I’m not sure about getting camels through the eye of a needle, but that’s fairly close; the car in that picture is a Lada Samara (about the same size as a mk2 Vw Golf/Rabbit).

  4. I’m not sure about getting camels through the eye of a needle, but that’s fairly close; the car in that picture is a Lada Samara (about the same size as a mk2 Vw Golf/Rabbit).

  5. Yup, we in the great state of WI pick our reps for their looks first, then check out their politics. We choose our MD’s the same way – then send them to Congress.I think Dr. Rob looks like Prof. Lupin in the Harry Potter movies, only less shabbily dressed. And I’ll bet Mrs. Rob is cool, hip, trendy and a hottie. If I had a blog, would I get extra points for that? Eh, I’d have said it anyhow.

  6. Yup, we in the great state of WI pick our reps for their looks first, then check out their politics. We choose our MD’s the same way – then send them to Congress.I think Dr. Rob looks like Prof. Lupin in the Harry Potter movies, only less shabbily dressed. And I’ll bet Mrs. Rob is cool, hip, trendy and a hottie. If I had a blog, would I get extra points for that? Eh, I’d have said it anyhow.

      1. Holy macaroni! I went back and read the WHOLE thing!!! I did! WOW! Gotta love those coin flips. Yesterday I was in a hurry and just ran a page search for my name and came up blank. Maybe I can’t even spell my own name?
        I proudly told my husband that I won.
        He was a little perplexed… “Won what?”
        “A golden llama award!”
        “A what?”
        “Never mind.”

        I’ll have to print my award off and pin it to my shirt.
        Now off to find your email address somewhere on your blog…

      1. Holy macaroni! I went back and read the WHOLE thing!!! I did! WOW! Gotta love those coin flips. Yesterday I was in a hurry and just ran a page search for my name and came up blank. Maybe I can’t even spell my own name?
        I proudly told my husband that I won.
        He was a little perplexed… “Won what?”
        “A golden llama award!”
        “A what?”
        “Never mind.”

        I’ll have to print my award off and pin it to my shirt.
        Now off to find your email address somewhere on your blog…

  7. Dr. Rob,
    Please forgive me if what I am about to write is not related to this particular post. However, I just finished reading your post on “Musings of a distracible Mind” and felt so compeled to comment on that article that, after much looking, found an up to date article that would allow me to write a comment. Perhaps, from your end, you can add this to the the page that the comments already related to that article are on. But I feel so strongly about what you wrote, and, being a nurse I just had to comment on it. Thank you for that article and thank you for being a Doctor that has a heart in his chest.

    As a nurse, and a chronic pain sufferer., I have a major concern regarding the direction this country is headed regarding the patient’s privacy rights, and, the doctor’s right to practice medicine as he or she sees fit depending on his/her objective assessments of their patients.
    All this because the general public, as well as the DEA, are ignorant to the way pain mediation works and what the REAL risks are by taking them.

    We fought a Revolutionary war to put a stop to the abuses those with power can inflict on it’s population. The DEA is abusing the power it has and is interfering in our lives today. We all suffer from it. The average citizen, the patient and the doctor. Back then, if the King of England thought there was a rebel living in a town of 100,000 people………. he would have the British army destroy the entire town and invade everyone’s home and stamp on everyone’s personal freedom in order to find the ONE rebel. In my opinion this is comparable to what the DEA is doing to us citizens now. In order to find the few who abuse the doctor/patient relationship………. we must all be monitored and searched and invaded. We fought a God Damn War to put a stop to this practice and here we are in the 21 century having to put up with the same tactics.

    The DEA has caused a domino effect of terror throughout the medical community so that doctors are terrified of providing pain medication for those who need them.

    There is a marked hypocrisy when you enter an emergency room, when plastered on all the walls are large posters stating how “important” your pain is to us. Please let us know if you are in pain so we can treat it. You have the right to have your pain treated. Then, when a patient states they are in pain, they are labeled a “drug seeker.” So the patient is left to suffer. And there is nothing the patient can do about it.

    The AMA has deemed pain the “Fifth” vital sign. This makes it as important as a heartbeat. However, in too many cases it is ignored and the patient is sent home without relief.

    Why is the government’s nose in the doctor/patient relationship? Why is there a war on doctors?

    There are more drugs than ever on the American street, which would imply to me that the DEA’s war on drugs is a failing. And this failure has shifted their focus to targeting doctors to justify their TAX PAYER funding.

    The DEA is not and elected body nor are they accountable to the American People. Nor do they have ANY medical training whatever in order to conclude whether a doctor is appropriately treating his or her patient.

    The DEA is patting itself on the back for solving a drug problem. They are not solving any problem. They are creating one. Millions of people who suffer from pain are not being treated for it because the doctors are terrified of being investigated, even if they are not doing anything wrong. They just don’t want the government intruding in their lives.

    The heroine dealer on the street is laughing under his breath while a doctor is being hauled away in handcuffs because he gave a pain pill to a patient who needed it. Meanwhile, no one is bothering the drug dealer on the corner.

    As my family has owned several restaurants in Manhattan, on restaurant row, in the heart of the theater district, I have had the pleasure of knowing most of the police on the beat on the street. They have told me time and time again that they know where every drug dealer that is selling drugs on the streets is located. However, they are ORDERED not to arrest them. Not to mention, the overcrowding of prisons etc. is deterring the police from arresting these criminals because there is no where to put them. The reasons go on and on why the drug dealer is left alone. Yet a doctor is at risk of loses his/her license. It is completely insane!!!

    Why doctors are not furious over this intrusion into their private practice is beyond my comprehension!! How dare some dope with a badge and a high school diploma (maybe) dictate how a doctor should treat his or her patient!!! If Iwere a doctor I would get all my fellow doctors together and become a major political force and start screaming my head off that a government agency won’t let me treat my patient’s as my training has taught me to do. Instead of looking out for the patient, doctors are forced to look out for thier own backs so they don’t lose everything. Do any of you doctors not find this infuriating?? Why are you sitting back and letting this happen so silently?

    I know there are statistics showing that not THAT many doctors have been arrested or have had their licenses taken away. But that does not stop the fear from infecting the doctoral culture which prevents them from appropriately treating their patients. Doctors have told me, “ the DEA won’t let me write the Rx.” “The DEA has informant pharmacies calling them whenever they get a narcotic Rx to let them know which doctor wrote it.” This is not my idea of a free America – Where government agencies are enrolling pharmacies to rat out doctors who write prescriptions!!

    Can you imagine going to school for 15 years, then taking an oath to treat your fellow human, and then not being allowed to because some bureaucrat with a badge, who, maybe, has a high school diploma and is using Nazi tactics to instill fear into the medical community so that doctors are afraid of losing everything they have worked so hard for – just because they filled a prescription?? Is this the free America you envision? Why are you silently allowing the government to intrude so intimately into your private practice where you cannot honor the oath you took when you became doctors for fear of losing everything you’ve worked so hard for??

    Although it may be a reality that there are those who use doctors to support their habit; they are a very small minority. Doctors are educated, brilliant people and can and do weed these people out as a matter of ethics or will suggest treatment as they can tell the difference between a real “Addict” and someone who has a legitimate need for pain relief. They don’t need a Government agency to tell them how to practice their medicine. It’s not a problem if a doctor won’t give medication to someone he or she assessed as an addict. It is a BIG problem when the doctor won’t give a medication to a patient who absolutely needs it due to fear of losing everything they’ve worked for.

    Also, hundreds if not thousands of studies have been done regarding pain management and the potential for addiction. Studies have found that those who take pain medication (Narcotics) for pain……… and pain is their motivation and pain relief is their goal, do not become psycho social drug addicts. There is a major difference between a psycho social drug addiction and someone who is “tolerant – physically dependent” on Narcotics. The vast vast majority of the latter group wean off their medication when no longer needed and live normal lives again without the need or desire for narcotics.

    Those who do become “Addicts” are not only a very small minority but are already predisposed to becoming addicts whether they see a doctor or not. These are the people who become alcoholics or drug addicts and can find all the Alcohol or heroine , or any other drug, they could ever want on our city streets. They don’t need doctors. There is ample supply on our streets! Because the DEA cannot get rid of the drugs on the streets………. so they go after legitimate doctors.

    And, even if a person who was not predisposed to becoming and addict before they started taking pain medication and then became addicted in a “Psycho social – Drug addict” way. There is treatment for this tiny minority. And they usually recover.

    Why must millions of our citizens who suffer from pain continue to suffer because there is a tiny minority of people who may abuse the system?

    Are parents not responsible for their own children? Must millions suffer because a few irresponsible parents don’t ensure their narcotics are not within reach of their children; If this is the DEA’s rational for the unreasonable monitoring of every move a doctor makes in his or her private practice?

    With every regulation and every intrusion and monitoring of our lives for the sake of our own “SAFTEY” we are losing our rights. It’s insulting!! The American people are not stupid and should not be treated like they cannot take care of themselves or be able to make their own health decisions by having government agencies like the DEA sitting in the room with the doctor and the patient; which is basically what they are doing……….. monitoring the doctor’s every move with every prescription they prescribe.

    John Kennedy prevented a nuclear war during the missile crisis while on stunning amounts of narcotic for the pain he experienced in his back. The pain medication he was on did NOT impair his judgment. Studies have also shown that when narcotics are taken for pain, they target the “MU” receptors that are related to the pain………. The unwanted side effects of getting “high” go away……. but the medication continues to work on the pain.

    Why doesn’t the DEA focus their attention on arresting the criminals on the streets instead of legitimate doctors whose hands are tied by government intrusion into their “PRIVATE” practice. This is the 21 century and there are treatments available for those who need it.
    There is NO reason why a patient suffering from pain must suffer due to the fear the medical community faces which prevents then from appropriately treating their patients.
    Doesn’t this piss you doctors off?? I’m stunned this goes on without complaint by those in the medical field.

    If patients become addicted…….. which I repeat…….. is a very tiny minority, there is treatment. The statistics, of those who become addicted, are certainly not enough to justify the intrusion the DEA engages in the private lives of patient’s and doctors at this time. Risk to benefit ratio must be initiated here.

    The risk of addiction does not justify causing terror throughout the medical community which is making doctors reluctant to treat their patients at all….. which is what is happening.

    More people die from Alcohol related deaths, in one year, than all the soldiers who died in a decade long was in Viet Nam. Alcohol is legal. What is with this obsession in this country with drugs. Alcohol kills and creats billions of dollars of lost production in the workplace than all the other drugs combined!!

    It’s amazing!!! It’s worth the risk of getting into your car and dying in a crash on your way to buy a twinkie so those with an obesity problem can keep that weight up, which by the way, is more dangerous to the individual and saps more money out of the taxpayer to take care of these people ( who do this to themselves and can be said to have a “food addiction”.)……… than giving someon a painkiller does……… but God forbid you ease someone’s pain.
    We going to create another government agency to keep the food out of the mouths of those who eat too much!! Is that the next step in controlling every aspect of our lives by the government?? Who, after all, know what best for us better than we do??

    For God’s sake, let the Doctors do their jobs without fear of losing everything they’ve worked so hard for.

    Regarding my pain, what works for me, is weaning off my meds several times a year and staying off them for several weeks. When I do this, my tolerance goes back down and I don’t have to ask the doctor to increase my medication. I don’t worry about addiction because I’m demonstrating to myself, and the doctor, that I can stop at will………….. and my intake is not an astronomical amount of medication. I’ve been on the same dose of medication for 15 years because I do this and the lowering of my tolerance, when I wean, provides adequate relief with the same dose. Using this strategy gives me a profound sense of control over my life, raises my moral and virtually eliminates the worry of the nightmare of addiction. So that’s one less burden.

    The strange thing is that I have lost doctors because I told him/her that I wanted to wean off my meds. Right away the red flags go up in their minds. They ask, ” Why do you want to wean off, do you think you have a drug problem?”

    It’s just crazy. What is up with our cultural views regarding pain relief and drugs?? We, who are in pain, seem to be in a no win situation in this country and no matter what we do we are placed in the ” you’re a drug addict” pile. When we are actively participating in our own care, as in my case, it becomes a problem. When we don’t show enough active participation (and leave it up to the doctors) it becomes a problem.

    Don’t we, who live with pain, have the right to HIPPA laws?? You can’t get a job in this country without pissing in a cup. And if a substance, that is unacceptable, is found – we have to explain why the substance is in our bodies, or we don’t get hired. In other words, I am being forced to tell strangers my private medical information, against my will or desire, in order to get a job in these good old United States of America the Land of the Free. Don’t I have the right, like any other patient, to keep my medical condition to myself? Can I not get a job without revealing what I don’t want to reveal??

    People would argue that for certain lines of work it is necessary to piss in a cup to monitor for drug use. However, if I were to have surgery and I knew my doctor suffered from panic/anxiety attacks, I would ask him, “Did you take your xanax today doctor? I don’t want you having a panic attack after you cut me wide open.” People who suffer from panic attacks do not respond appropriately to the external environment. They can be dangerous. Better to be on the appropriate medication. Why should someone be forced to reveal this ailment if they want employment?

    Should we rule the lives of diabetics? Should we be asking people if they are diabetic before we hire them? Diabetics are notoriously known for not being compliant with their sugar intake and control. If Blood sugar it too high…….. they cannot think strait and make errors. If they take too much insulin……. same thing. What we are relying on is that the Diabetic is responsible in managing their ailment. And statistically they are not compliant; which makes them potentially dangerous.

    Do people who have pain not have that same responsibility? To take their medication responsibly? Why must we be monitored when others with ailments that can cause serious errors and injury are not monitored? I don’t like this double standard when it comes to medical conditions that require pain medication.

    I’m not liking this government takeover of our medical lives. If this happens, the government will know which citizen is sick, what disease they have, what they take, where they work, what type of work they do………. and maybe,,,,,,, just maybe…… will decide (for us) whether we should not be working in that line of work due to our illness. Scary don’t you think? If the DEA is sitting in the room with the Doctor and patient at this time……….. just imagine what it will be like when the entire federal government is sitting in the room with us if Obama gets his way!!!

    God help us all.

    1. Yikes! I have a distractible mind! I appreciate the emotion and frustration you have. It looks like you need a blog of your own. The bottom line is that it is not at all simple. Doctors are partly responsible for this due to sloppy prescribing of controlled drugs.
      But your point really does get lost in the words. I have learned that lesson the hard way.

    2. WOW!! Longest comment ever!
      John, I’d agree with Rob that you should open your own blog.

      Rob, I think there is an issue or 2 here that might come inside your remit (not the DEA or the “war on drugs” bits, although I’ll offer the 18th in evidence as to how well that’s going to work).

  8. Dr. Rob,
    Please forgive me if what I am about to write is not related to this particular post. However, I just finished reading your post on “Musings of a distracible Mind” and felt so compeled to comment on that article that, after much looking, found an up to date article that would allow me to write a comment. Perhaps, from your end, you can add this to the the page that the comments already related to that article are on. But I feel so strongly about what you wrote, and, being a nurse I just had to comment on it. Thank you for that article and thank you for being a Doctor that has a heart in his chest.

    As a nurse, and a chronic pain sufferer., I have a major concern regarding the direction this country is headed regarding the patient’s privacy rights, and, the doctor’s right to practice medicine as he or she sees fit depending on his/her objective assessments of their patients.
    All this because the general public, as well as the DEA, are ignorant to the way pain mediation works and what the REAL risks are by taking them.

    We fought a Revolutionary war to put a stop to the abuses those with power can inflict on it’s population. The DEA is abusing the power it has and is interfering in our lives today. We all suffer from it. The average citizen, the patient and the doctor. Back then, if the King of England thought there was a rebel living in a town of 100,000 people………. he would have the British army destroy the entire town and invade everyone’s home and stamp on everyone’s personal freedom in order to find the ONE rebel. In my opinion this is comparable to what the DEA is doing to us citizens now. In order to find the few who abuse the doctor/patient relationship………. we must all be monitored and searched and invaded. We fought a God Damn War to put a stop to this practice and here we are in the 21 century having to put up with the same tactics.

    The DEA has caused a domino effect of terror throughout the medical community so that doctors are terrified of providing pain medication for those who need them.

    There is a marked hypocrisy when you enter an emergency room, when plastered on all the walls are large posters stating how “important” your pain is to us. Please let us know if you are in pain so we can treat it. You have the right to have your pain treated. Then, when a patient states they are in pain, they are labeled a “drug seeker.” So the patient is left to suffer. And there is nothing the patient can do about it.

    The AMA has deemed pain the “Fifth” vital sign. This makes it as important as a heartbeat. However, in too many cases it is ignored and the patient is sent home without relief.

    Why is the government’s nose in the doctor/patient relationship? Why is there a war on doctors?

    There are more drugs than ever on the American street, which would imply to me that the DEA’s war on drugs is a failing. And this failure has shifted their focus to targeting doctors to justify their TAX PAYER funding.

    The DEA is not and elected body nor are they accountable to the American People. Nor do they have ANY medical training whatever in order to conclude whether a doctor is appropriately treating his or her patient.

    The DEA is patting itself on the back for solving a drug problem. They are not solving any problem. They are creating one. Millions of people who suffer from pain are not being treated for it because the doctors are terrified of being investigated, even if they are not doing anything wrong. They just don’t want the government intruding in their lives.

    The heroine dealer on the street is laughing under his breath while a doctor is being hauled away in handcuffs because he gave a pain pill to a patient who needed it. Meanwhile, no one is bothering the drug dealer on the corner.

    As my family has owned several restaurants in Manhattan, on restaurant row, in the heart of the theater district, I have had the pleasure of knowing most of the police on the beat on the street. They have told me time and time again that they know where every drug dealer that is selling drugs on the streets is located. However, they are ORDERED not to arrest them. Not to mention, the overcrowding of prisons etc. is deterring the police from arresting these criminals because there is no where to put them. The reasons go on and on why the drug dealer is left alone. Yet a doctor is at risk of loses his/her license. It is completely insane!!!

    Why doctors are not furious over this intrusion into their private practice is beyond my comprehension!! How dare some dope with a badge and a high school diploma (maybe) dictate how a doctor should treat his or her patient!!! If Iwere a doctor I would get all my fellow doctors together and become a major political force and start screaming my head off that a government agency won’t let me treat my patient’s as my training has taught me to do. Instead of looking out for the patient, doctors are forced to look out for thier own backs so they don’t lose everything. Do any of you doctors not find this infuriating?? Why are you sitting back and letting this happen so silently?

    I know there are statistics showing that not THAT many doctors have been arrested or have had their licenses taken away. But that does not stop the fear from infecting the doctoral culture which prevents them from appropriately treating their patients. Doctors have told me, “ the DEA won’t let me write the Rx.” “The DEA has informant pharmacies calling them whenever they get a narcotic Rx to let them know which doctor wrote it.” This is not my idea of a free America – Where government agencies are enrolling pharmacies to rat out doctors who write prescriptions!!

    Can you imagine going to school for 15 years, then taking an oath to treat your fellow human, and then not being allowed to because some bureaucrat with a badge, who, maybe, has a high school diploma and is using Nazi tactics to instill fear into the medical community so that doctors are afraid of losing everything they have worked so hard for – just because they filled a prescription?? Is this the free America you envision? Why are you silently allowing the government to intrude so intimately into your private practice where you cannot honor the oath you took when you became doctors for fear of losing everything you’ve worked so hard for??

    Although it may be a reality that there are those who use doctors to support their habit; they are a very small minority. Doctors are educated, brilliant people and can and do weed these people out as a matter of ethics or will suggest treatment as they can tell the difference between a real “Addict” and someone who has a legitimate need for pain relief. They don’t need a Government agency to tell them how to practice their medicine. It’s not a problem if a doctor won’t give medication to someone he or she assessed as an addict. It is a BIG problem when the doctor won’t give a medication to a patient who absolutely needs it due to fear of losing everything they’ve worked for.

    Also, hundreds if not thousands of studies have been done regarding pain management and the potential for addiction. Studies have found that those who take pain medication (Narcotics) for pain……… and pain is their motivation and pain relief is their goal, do not become psycho social drug addicts. There is a major difference between a psycho social drug addiction and someone who is “tolerant – physically dependent” on Narcotics. The vast vast majority of the latter group wean off their medication when no longer needed and live normal lives again without the need or desire for narcotics.

    Those who do become “Addicts” are not only a very small minority but are already predisposed to becoming addicts whether they see a doctor or not. These are the people who become alcoholics or drug addicts and can find all the Alcohol or heroine , or any other drug, they could ever want on our city streets. They don’t need doctors. There is ample supply on our streets! Because the DEA cannot get rid of the drugs on the streets………. so they go after legitimate doctors.

    And, even if a person who was not predisposed to becoming and addict before they started taking pain medication and then became addicted in a “Psycho social – Drug addict” way. There is treatment for this tiny minority. And they usually recover.

    Why must millions of our citizens who suffer from pain continue to suffer because there is a tiny minority of people who may abuse the system?

    Are parents not responsible for their own children? Must millions suffer because a few irresponsible parents don’t ensure their narcotics are not within reach of their children; If this is the DEA’s rational for the unreasonable monitoring of every move a doctor makes in his or her private practice?

    With every regulation and every intrusion and monitoring of our lives for the sake of our own “SAFTEY” we are losing our rights. It’s insulting!! The American people are not stupid and should not be treated like they cannot take care of themselves or be able to make their own health decisions by having government agencies like the DEA sitting in the room with the doctor and the patient; which is basically what they are doing……….. monitoring the doctor’s every move with every prescription they prescribe.

    John Kennedy prevented a nuclear war during the missile crisis while on stunning amounts of narcotic for the pain he experienced in his back. The pain medication he was on did NOT impair his judgment. Studies have also shown that when narcotics are taken for pain, they target the “MU” receptors that are related to the pain………. The unwanted side effects of getting “high” go away……. but the medication continues to work on the pain.

    Why doesn’t the DEA focus their attention on arresting the criminals on the streets instead of legitimate doctors whose hands are tied by government intrusion into their “PRIVATE” practice. This is the 21 century and there are treatments available for those who need it.
    There is NO reason why a patient suffering from pain must suffer due to the fear the medical community faces which prevents then from appropriately treating their patients.
    Doesn’t this piss you doctors off?? I’m stunned this goes on without complaint by those in the medical field.

    If patients become addicted…….. which I repeat…….. is a very tiny minority, there is treatment. The statistics, of those who become addicted, are certainly not enough to justify the intrusion the DEA engages in the private lives of patient’s and doctors at this time. Risk to benefit ratio must be initiated here.

    The risk of addiction does not justify causing terror throughout the medical community which is making doctors reluctant to treat their patients at all….. which is what is happening.

    More people die from Alcohol related deaths, in one year, than all the soldiers who died in a decade long was in Viet Nam. Alcohol is legal. What is with this obsession in this country with drugs. Alcohol kills and creats billions of dollars of lost production in the workplace than all the other drugs combined!!

    It’s amazing!!! It’s worth the risk of getting into your car and dying in a crash on your way to buy a twinkie so those with an obesity problem can keep that weight up, which by the way, is more dangerous to the individual and saps more money out of the taxpayer to take care of these people ( who do this to themselves and can be said to have a “food addiction”.)……… than giving someon a painkiller does……… but God forbid you ease someone’s pain.
    We going to create another government agency to keep the food out of the mouths of those who eat too much!! Is that the next step in controlling every aspect of our lives by the government?? Who, after all, know what best for us better than we do??

    For God’s sake, let the Doctors do their jobs without fear of losing everything they’ve worked so hard for.

    Regarding my pain, what works for me, is weaning off my meds several times a year and staying off them for several weeks. When I do this, my tolerance goes back down and I don’t have to ask the doctor to increase my medication. I don’t worry about addiction because I’m demonstrating to myself, and the doctor, that I can stop at will………….. and my intake is not an astronomical amount of medication. I’ve been on the same dose of medication for 15 years because I do this and the lowering of my tolerance, when I wean, provides adequate relief with the same dose. Using this strategy gives me a profound sense of control over my life, raises my moral and virtually eliminates the worry of the nightmare of addiction. So that’s one less burden.

    The strange thing is that I have lost doctors because I told him/her that I wanted to wean off my meds. Right away the red flags go up in their minds. They ask, ” Why do you want to wean off, do you think you have a drug problem?”

    It’s just crazy. What is up with our cultural views regarding pain relief and drugs?? We, who are in pain, seem to be in a no win situation in this country and no matter what we do we are placed in the ” you’re a drug addict” pile. When we are actively participating in our own care, as in my case, it becomes a problem. When we don’t show enough active participation (and leave it up to the doctors) it becomes a problem.

    Don’t we, who live with pain, have the right to HIPPA laws?? You can’t get a job in this country without pissing in a cup. And if a substance, that is unacceptable, is found – we have to explain why the substance is in our bodies, or we don’t get hired. In other words, I am being forced to tell strangers my private medical information, against my will or desire, in order to get a job in these good old United States of America the Land of the Free. Don’t I have the right, like any other patient, to keep my medical condition to myself? Can I not get a job without revealing what I don’t want to reveal??

    People would argue that for certain lines of work it is necessary to piss in a cup to monitor for drug use. However, if I were to have surgery and I knew my doctor suffered from panic/anxiety attacks, I would ask him, “Did you take your xanax today doctor? I don’t want you having a panic attack after you cut me wide open.” People who suffer from panic attacks do not respond appropriately to the external environment. They can be dangerous. Better to be on the appropriate medication. Why should someone be forced to reveal this ailment if they want employment?

    Should we rule the lives of diabetics? Should we be asking people if they are diabetic before we hire them? Diabetics are notoriously known for not being compliant with their sugar intake and control. If Blood sugar it too high…….. they cannot think strait and make errors. If they take too much insulin……. same thing. What we are relying on is that the Diabetic is responsible in managing their ailment. And statistically they are not compliant; which makes them potentially dangerous.

    Do people who have pain not have that same responsibility? To take their medication responsibly? Why must we be monitored when others with ailments that can cause serious errors and injury are not monitored? I don’t like this double standard when it comes to medical conditions that require pain medication.

    I’m not liking this government takeover of our medical lives. If this happens, the government will know which citizen is sick, what disease they have, what they take, where they work, what type of work they do………. and maybe,,,,,,, just maybe…… will decide (for us) whether we should not be working in that line of work due to our illness. Scary don’t you think? If the DEA is sitting in the room with the Doctor and patient at this time……….. just imagine what it will be like when the entire federal government is sitting in the room with us if Obama gets his way!!!

    God help us all.

    1. Yikes! I have a distractible mind! I appreciate the emotion and frustration you have. It looks like you need a blog of your own. The bottom line is that it is not at all simple. Doctors are partly responsible for this due to sloppy prescribing of controlled drugs.
      But your point really does get lost in the words. I have learned that lesson the hard way.

    2. WOW!! Longest comment ever!
      John, I’d agree with Rob that you should open your own blog.

      Rob, I think there is an issue or 2 here that might come inside your remit (not the DEA or the “war on drugs” bits, although I’ll offer the 18th in evidence as to how well that’s going to work).

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